Dysfunctional Dreamer

Farties

This is a very much delayed blog. Though nothing exciting has happened since I last wrote an entry,I just thought I ought to give my fingers some much needed exercise. Also, I need to get my brain working- too much reading, and not enough writing on my part.

The highlight of my entry- all about farting. This is purely inspired since a weekend ago, when people kept farting in the entrance of the shop( and I mean, NEAR, before the make it OUT of the shop...) and you would think they would have the decency to hold it in for about 30cm to the door!!! It was one of those days where there was more ass-pollution than usual. I'm sure some of the people paying at the till, the boy with man-boobs, and some other suspicious characters just let rip...not considering the slow painful death (also, the damage done to our respitory systems) that we poor shop assistants have to endure. Badly enough, in the heat, the shop is especially STUFFY with very little ventilation inside.

In tribute to all the farties out there, I have compiled the worst possible places to get caught with nowhere to run:

1. The lift : The smallest possible non-escapable confined space - highest chance of passing out if you're the unlucky victim.
2. A small shop : Not enough ventilation, as of the abovementioned.
3. When sitting next to someone : You can't be rude, so you just take a deep breath and hold it...or not!
4. In the bus : Whether air-conditioned or not, the air in the bus circulates around...you get my drift.
5. The toilet : Although it already smells pretty stale, the addition of an atomic fart is nonetheless unwelcome.
6. When asleep next to someone : No, fanning the duvet and sharing the joy isn't funny.

So, next time you encounter a fartie, or have to have to fart....lets try to at least be courteous about it - and eat less bread, goddammit!!!

posted by nori_b @ 1:44 PM